My first post was to the Mother’s that get to celebrate this day with their kids. My heart aches to write this Mother’s Day Post. I wish this other side of Mother’s Day didn’t exist. It’s the side that no one talked about before, the one with tears, darkness and empty arms. 

To the Mother who doesn’t get to celebrate this day

To those who lost, who never got a chance, and those who dream

One of the hardest days for you is probably today. It doesn’t hurt as much as the day you lost your baby or the day you learned you might never have one. But it’s all the same. We carry broken empty hearts with us today. No Flowers, No Cards, No Baby.

I know it doesn’t help much but I am celebrating you today. I actually think about you every day. Praying baby dust falls on your laps, praying that the ache you feel every morning fades, I pray you find peace with today.

It seems everyone is celebrating today, might even feel like the world is gaining up against you. I understand. One year I turned my phone off the whole day. I didn’t want to couldn’t deal with Mother’s Day. Even if your baby isn’t here today or you never got the chance to be pregnant, you deserve flowers, you deserve cards. You deserve the healthiest happiest baby if that’s what you desire. It’s okay to roll your eyes when you see the girl from high school that maybe isn’t the greatest role model get flowers when she gets credit for being a mom, even if she’s a lousy one. It’s okay to cry and feel however you want to feel. This day is a day you want to celebrate, you want nothing more than to be a mom. No one and nothing should take that away from you. Every emotion that troubles you today, it’s okay.

What is not okay is to give up. If you want to celebrate this day, with a child in your arms, DO NOT GIVE UP. Motherhood comes in many ways. Please, don’t stop until you’re proud. When you get that voice in your head saying that maybe it’s not meant to be, shut those voices out. It’s not true. If you’re thinking maybe you did something to deserve this, it’s not true! You’re  probably thinking every terrible thought because you’re tired, you are fighting demons every single day. It’s to protect your heart, maybe convince yourself you could live a full life without a child. If this is you, you’re not done with this journey. You’re not alone.

Please be gentle on yourself today. You’re only human. Do what you need to do to get through this day. Tomorrow wake up ready to conquer. Wake up ready to beat the odds stacked against you. You WILL be a mother with a baby here with you. You are already a mom, with the heart of a fighter. You’re a Warrior.  Happy Mothers Day to the ones that deserve this day the most, the ones that want nothing more than to have their healthy beautiful babies here. To those who lost, who never got a chance, and those who dream. I promise it will happen. Don’t stop until you’re proud.

Love,

The mom who has lost, waited, prayed, and cried. A LOT.